Early Retirement

I need to retire early tonight

So that I can function as a proper person tomorrow

Today was packed full of lethargy and sorrow

I was a curmudgeonous zombie

I was a prick

I was, well…I was myself

But that’s beside the point

Tomorrow I will be a curmudgenous zombie prick

Who’s had eight hours sleep

Posted in Poetry, prompts


I am a mirror, yes I am

I’ll make you look good if I can

But, you must meet me halfway, lad

Oops, I’m sorry ma’am, that was my bad

My compendious nature, of which I’m proud, does render me Succinct

My answers will be epigrammatic, pithy, short and sweet

But when I drink the alcohol, I am no longer laconic

I am a big old blabbermouth, with talk that’s supersonic


Posted in prompts

The Pickled Juggler


I threw a sword into the air, a chainsaw and a sickle

But then the sun got in my eyes and I was in a pickle

I tried to step away from harm and let them hit the ground

The chainsaw cut off my left ear, the sickle bonked my crown

Deciding where to stand when juggling death is an easy task

Just have the sun in back of you, or it will kick your ass

Posted in prompts


I tried to placate the crotchety old dude

He was boorish, obnoxious, bumptious, and rude

I tried to conciliate with reason and plea

But I can’t mollify when I’m dealing with me

Posted in Poetry, prompts


Purple is the oddest color
in sight, it does imbue
it’s a mix of my least favorite color red
and my favorite color, blue

when it shines from the crown, or the cape of a king
it’s regal, and I do adore
but I’m not as apt to be a great fan
if it appears on a big dinosaur

Posted in prompts, Uncategorized


Flummoxed and bewildered
puzzled and perplexed
my brain does discombobulate
when taking a math test

The numbers muddle up my brain
as neurons start to misfire
transported to the Baskervilles
I’m sucked into the deep mire

Some people aren’t the kind of chaps
where numbers adapt to brain
so if I see another

If a train is traveling 200 miles an hour

I just may go insane