Kudos to my piece of shit phone. Kudos to the battery being completely drained after 5 minutes. Kudos to the blisters and blood on my fingers from me having to jam the cord in and hold so that I can charge it for an increase of maybe 2 percent. Kudos to technology that kaputs after 3 years. Kudos to making the stupid thing a lifeline. Kudos to satellites. Kudos to phone towers. Kudos to people driving while texting and killing themselves and other people. Kudos to people ambling like zombies while inserting smiley face emojis. Kudos to convenience. Kudos to the 21st century. Kudos, kudos, kudos.
Oh yeah, did I mention that I hate my fucking phone and am going to have to walk around with a big ass iPad just to receive texts from people until I get a new one.
Yeah, I know that it’s not that big of a deal. I’m alive, I have a roof over my head, I can walk, I can see, I have money for food, I’m not homeless. I’m just pissed. I’m sure I’ll get over it. Probably about 5 minutes after I post this and think, “What a big crybaby”.